You’re on a date. Or maybe they’re chatting you up in a club/bar. And then they say, “So… why are you still single?” What kind of shit is that?
I can tell you all, if women knew the answer to this question, most women, i.e. the ones that don’t want to be single, wouldn’t be. I’m single because I don’t have a boyfriend, which is usually what’s needed to change my relationship status. Why I don’t have a boyfriend at this particular time shouldn’t really matter because ultimately my single status means that the guy is in with a chance.
I know it’s hard and that initial dates can have awkward, uncomfortable moments. However, nothing puts my back up quicker than someone asking, “So… why are you still single?” I feel as if I’m expected to display a flaw to answer the question. Guys generally mean it in a flattering way. Or, at least they think it looks that way. But what about when friends, family, colleagues badger you with similar questions or statements?
It’s bad enough when you have nosey loved ones ask these annoying questions. When it’s the guy chatting you up, it just makes you cringe.
“Single” isn’t a bad word, but people have a terrible habit of making it sound as if it’s something that makes you something to worry about. What happens when people ask you this question when you’ve been dating for 15, 20, 25 years?!
Shit happens, relationships end, and dating is really hard. It’s not that easy to meet a guy to have a relationship with, and past experiences can add to the awkwardness of finding somebody new. It’s a big, bad world out there where most people do get burnt in the name of love. When people ask silly questions like Why are you still single?, they have no idea what that person has gone through.
Of course it can be meant in a complimentary way. Still, it would be wise to choose your words carefully. Tone also makes a hell of a difference. If there’s something else you can say that sounds more positive, say it!
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