The Underdog Advantage: Breaking Cycles with Keeley Taverner

In this week’s episode of The Baggage Reclaim Sessions, I chat with my friend and psychotherapist Keeley Taverner about her incredible journey from young single mother to building a thriving therapy practice specialising in toxic relationships and narcissistic abuse.

Keeley opens up about how an abusive relationship that left her with her ex’s debts became the catalyst for her transformation, leading her to pursue education without traditional qualifications and eventually carve out her unique space in the therapy world.

We dig into the reality of the therapy industry, the challenges of social mobility, the explosion of narcissism discourse online, and her perspective on modern dating as a successful woman in her forties. This conversation is a powerful reminder that your background doesn’t determine your future, and sometimes being the underdog gives you nothing to lose and everything to gain.

IN THIS EPISODE…

• Being the underdog can be your greatest advantage. When you feel like you have nothing to lose, you’re more willing to take risks others won’t.
• Breaking cycles requires looking at your own patterns, not just diagnosing others. Real healing happens when you get curious about why you’re drawn to certain people and what you’re trying to resolve from your past.
• Specialisation and authenticity beat trying to fit traditional moulds. Keeley carved out her niche by talking about what she actually knew. Her background and appearance became assets when she stopped trying to look like other therapists and started serving her specific community.
• Social mobility creates unexpected dating challenges for successful women. Educational and professional advancement can shrink your dating pool when cultural expectations still assume women should “date up.” This creates a complex dynamic where success in one area of life can lead to isolation in another, requiring honest self-reflection about what you actually want versus what you think you should want.
• Real connection happens in person, not through endless online research or swiping. Whether it’s learning about relationships or meeting potential partners, there’s no substitute for face-to-face interaction. Taking courses, networking events, and having actual conversations create opportunities that doom-scrolling and app-swiping never will.

LINKS MENTIONED AND RECOMMENDED RESOURCES

• Keeley Taverner keyforchange.com
• Keeley Taverner’s Instagram and TikTok
• Ep. 143: Is an Outdated Version of You Deciding What You’re Capable Of?
• Ep. 293: It’s Not Too Late: Karen Arthur on Reinventing Yourself in Midlife and Beyond
• Ep. 147: Till Now, I Always Did Fine On My Own
• Ep. 250: We Will Be Changed By The Things We Do (and that’s okay)
• Ep. 168: Freaking Out Over Decisions (lessons from panicking about my daughter’s exams)
• Ep. 258: It’s Not Our Job to Meet Our Parents’ Expectations
• Building habits challenges our identity. We’re capable of more than we think.
• Why Online Dating Profiles Can’t Live Up To Real Life
• We Need To Talk About Narcissists: 20 Mindset Shifts To Help You Stop Crazy-Making Yourself
• Giving Love Requires the Emotional Generosity of Empathy and Compassion
• Ep. 213: There’s No Need to Try & Meet All of Your Needs On Your Own
• Challenging the misconceptions about yourself, love, & relationships
• Life Lessons: How to Identify What You Need to Learn to Move On
• Don’t Let Your Inner Critic Convince You That Your Achievement Was A Fluke
• When they collect friendships with exes, get out of the harem!
• Narcissistic Harems In A Nutshell – Why it’s time to stop envying the ex and various hanger-on’s

SUPPORT THE PODCAST

Donate to the podcast tip jar

CONNECT WITH ME

• Leave a voice note for the podcast
• Sign up for my newsletter
• Follow me on Instagram 
• Follow me on TikTok
• Baggage Reclaim Facebook page 

Add to favorites