The Blog

Honesty’s Got To Cut Both Ways

As many of you know, I’m on a low BS diet and so while I don’t go out of my way to call people out on their BS, when I’m in a situation where the person is trying to get me to agree with it, I struggle, like when I had a relative complaining about a...

About Going In With An Open Mind

by NATALIE | Dating

For some people, when they go on dates, they end up being guilty of this dangerous optimism where they’re basically acting like they’ve won the lottery before the numbers have been called. They’re ‘buzzing’ and ‘spending the...

Opting Out Means Consciously Making Different Choices

by NATALIE | Healing the Past

When I suggest to people that they could opt out of the Disappointment Cycle in their lives, which is where they keep responding in a similar manner because they hope that they’re going to get something (a relationship, validation etc.,) and then it...

Is It Time for You to Opt Out of the Disappointment Cycle?

by NATALIE | Healing the Past

Sometimes you can find yourself trapped in this cycle of doing the same thing over and over again on the basis that, in spite of evidence to the contrary, you still believe there’s the possibility of the original reward. On some level, you’re hoping for a...

“I can’t believe they’ve changed – What’s wrong with me?”

by NATALIE | Boundaries

A few years back, a longtime couple finally got married after a gazillion years together (OK a couple of decades or so), kids, abuse, affairs, outside kids, and a steady, unrelenting devotion by her that would make your eyes water in disbelief – they say love is...

Relationships are 100:100. It’s Tricky To Divide Relationships and People Into Halves.

by NATALIE | Relationships

Whenever I hear people describing relationships as 50:50, I wonder how one goes about dividing a relationship in half. After all, half of a relationship is pretty subjective and open to interpretation. One person’s ‘50%’ is another person’s...

Is It Time To Take a Break From Facebook? When Facebook Is ‘In Charge’ Of Your Self-Esteem

by NATALIE | Relationships

I know somebody whose whole life is dictated by Facebook. She shares the minutiae of her life from what she eats, to the person in her office who is wearing on her last nerve, to the constant changing of her relationship status, to monitoring mutual friends of exes...

Change The Meaning, Change The Feeling

by NATALIE | Healing the Past

Throughout my life I’ve had various experiences that have impacted me and triggered some judgement of me (by me) and then later down the line, those experiences have had less of a hold on me. In retrospect I learned that the meaning of these difficult...

When You Feel Like People Won’t “Let” You Be Yourself

by NATALIE | Self

Many of us have grown up around people who have their own ‘quirky’, annoying, or downright outrageous ways of behaving. Some of us have been spared the childhood induction but then in adulthood have discovered that we clash with certain types of people or...

Is The ‘Rejection’ Really About You? (Yep, Still Working On Letting Go)

by NATALIE | Healing the Past

Many of the issues we have with our self-esteem or why we stay in a dubious relationship or why we struggle to move past something, are tied into where we feel that we’ve been dismissed, knocked back, or turned down as if we’re not ‘up to...

Getting Stuck On ‘Connection’ & Why I’m Working On Letting Go (Again)

by NATALIE | Healing the Past

Many of you who read Baggage Reclaim have felt this ‘love’ or ‘connection’ with someone that appears to persist in spite of compelling information and experience that communicates that you’d be better off distancing yourself or severing...

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I’ve been running Baggage Reclaim since September 2005, and I’ve spent many thousands of hours writing this labour of love. The site has been ad-free the entire time, and it costs hundreds of pounds a month to run it on my own. If what I share here has helped you and you’re in a position to do so, I would love if you could make a donation. Your support is so very much appreciated! Thank you.

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The Emotional Baggage Sessions

Honesty’s Got To Cut Both Ways

About Going In With An Open Mind

Opting Out Means Consciously Making Different Choices

Is It Time for You to Opt Out of the Disappointment Cycle?

“I can’t believe they’ve changed – What’s wrong with me?”

Relationships are 100:100. It’s Tricky To Divide Relationships and People Into Halves.

Is It Time To Take a Break From Facebook? When Facebook Is ‘In Charge’ Of Your Self-Esteem

Change The Meaning, Change The Feeling

When You Feel Like People Won’t “Let” You Be Yourself

Is The ‘Rejection’ Really About You? (Yep, Still Working On Letting Go)

Getting Stuck On ‘Connection’ & Why I’m Working On Letting Go (Again)

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