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Baggage Reclaim with Natalie Lue
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How can they keep doing what they know will hurt us?

by NATALIE | Healing the Past

Some of us find it really hard to imagine hurting someone and if we were to find ourselves in this unimaginable position, we’d feel terrible about it. It would play on our mind, we’d be desperate to express remorse, to begin to make amends, to show how...

When you consciously want a relationship but subconsciously feel bad about you & relationships, it’s a recipe for unavailability

by NATALIE | Healing the Past

For a long time, I blamed bad luck, not exactly having any examples of healthy relationships, and the parade of men that I’d dated or gone out with, for why I couldn’t sustain a relationship and why they were always unhealthy. Deep down I felt that all of my...
About that time when I found out a friend is dating an ex from Mr Unavailable and the Fallback Girl…

About that time when I found out a friend is dating an ex from Mr Unavailable and the Fallback Girl…

by NATALIE | Dating

A few months back, I reunited with an old school friend and we got talking about her love life. As she recounted her experiences with a Mr Unavailable, something said to ask who he was (the ‘ole spidey senses were up) and lo and behold, it was an ex from almost...
Despite ‘Good Points’, We Deal With the Consequences of People Coming as Full Packages

Despite ‘Good Points’, We Deal With the Consequences of People Coming as Full Packages

by NATALIE | Self

Any toxic relationship I’ve been involved in has always kept going because of my essentially cherry-picking what I wanted to remember about the person and the relationship, romantic or otherwise. While I spent most of my life feeling wounded by my father’s...

The Long-Shot Mentality – Are you setting yourself faux goals?

by NATALIE | Self

  Many BR readers are perplexed by why someonone would get tangled in a fantasy relationship or persist in being in unavailable relationships. When I wrote You Can Be In Love On Your Own…But a Mutual Relationship Takes Two, the comments and my inbox filled...
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I’ve been running Baggage Reclaim since September 2005, and I’ve spent many thousands of hours writing this labour of love. The site has been ad-free the entire time, and it costs hundreds of pounds a month to run it on my own. If what I share here has helped you and you’re in a position to do so, I would love if you could make a donation. Your support is so very much appreciated! Thank you.

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  • Miss You, Miss You, Oops, But I’m Not Getting Back With You: When Your Ex Says They Miss You But You’re Still Broken Up
  • Letting Go of a Relationship That Doesn’t Exist

Copyright Natalie Lue 2005-2026, All rights reserved. Written and express permission along with credit is needed to reproduce and distribute excerpts or entire pieces of my work.
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