Commitment to self is one of the four qualities of a loving partner, along with emotionally available, ownership, and a positive outlook. A partner with commitment to self, likes, knows and trust themselves (or actively strives to do so). They don’t abuse themselves or others or tolerate it. They’re secure in who they are and strives to be an action taker.
Committing with and to others is founded on an ability to commit to being yourself. If you’re serious about love, care, trust and respect, you’ve got to have your back. You’ve got to be more willing to own your needs, desires, expectations, feelings and opinions. In essence, this means owning your values and boundaries.
Someone with commitment to self is open to increasing self-awareness and self-knowledge.
It’s only through a more connected relationship with ourselves that we can adequately take care of our own needs, expectations, desires, feelings and opinions and be open to authentic giving and receiving with a partner. As a result, self-care is a critical component of the quality of commitment to self.
From a relationship perspective, two people who want to be loving partners need to be aware of their blind spots and past patterns. You each need to be responsible for handling your respective emotional baggage and willing to positively learn from experiences so that you can evolve. Two partners who see relationships as an opportunity to become more compassionate and loving don’t power struggle together.
Remember though, commitment to self is also about trusting enough to ask for help. It’s a form of letting people into our growth.
I’ve been running Baggage Reclaim since September 2005, and I’ve spent many thousands of hours writing this labour of love. The site has been ad-free the entire time, and it costs hundreds of pounds a month to run it on my own. If what I share here has helped you and you’re in a position to do so, I would love if you could make a donation. Your support is so very much appreciated! Thank you.
Copyright Natalie Lue 2005-2025, All rights reserved. Written and express permission along with credit is needed to reproduce and distribute excerpts or entire pieces of my work.
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